The most beautiful thing in the world

There’s something powerful about the tie between lovers.

There’s something amazing about the love of family.

My grandmother Ochs went to the hospital Friday night after Christmas.  She has been struggling with her health for a couple years now.  She collapsed in the bathroom as she was getting ready for bed.  I don’t know if anyone knows yet why.  But I believe that she collapsed so that she would go to the hospital.  Because this morning her lungs filled up with liquid and she couldn’t breath.  The nurse sedated her and put a tube down her throat, she now has a machine breathing for her.

And now while my grandmother is in the hospital, family fills up her room for hours at a time.  We have pulled together to support each other.  It’s a wonder she can rest with all of us around.  lol  I know she loves it though because she is scared and loves knowing she is not alone. 

I’ve never seen my grandfather cry.  Until today.  Twice.  He is the strongest, most amazing man I know.  I think my grandmother is the luckiest woman in the world.  She is loosing her eyesight and he reads to her all the time.  He drives her around wherever she wants to go and he holds her hand at dinner.  My grandfather is scared too now.  He may lose his beloved. 

I visited my grandmother in the hospital.  I knew she would be bad off and I was prepared.  I worked on her feet and head doing a bit of reflexology and energy work.  What I wasn’t prepared for was seeing my grandfather so upset (and yet so strong) and my dad coming into the room and seeing the tears in his eyes.  I lost it.  I cried. Silently, so as to not disturb grandma. 

My grandparents relationship may involve nit-picking and annoyance ... like any relationship.  But it’s also full of a powerful, powerful love.  When my grandmother got agitated – she is sedated but part conscious too and since she has so many tubes and wires she cannot talk and her hands are tied to the bed posts so she won’t rip them out – so when she was upset none of us could calm her down.  My grandfather spoke strong through the tears in his voice and told her she was ok and he was right there and everyone in the room loved her so much.  Her eyes hazily drifted to the sound of his voice and she took a deep breath and drifted back to sleep, calmed. 

The fear of being alone is so powerful.  I feel it strongly.  I fear I will never find someone like my grandparents have in each other.  But now I see the fear of being alone surfacing in them too... as my grandmother goes through this and my grandfather faces the fact that he might loose her. 

But right now, they do have each other.  And it’s the most beautiful thing in the world.